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No. of Recommendations: 2
Objective: produce fictitious yet funny country / western song titles.

I'll go first

"I GOT SOMETHING IN MY EYE (AND IT AIN'T YOU)"

yee-ha',
Diane
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No. of Recommendations: 3
I Knew What Life Was After Grandpa Said, 'Pull My Finger'.

MichaelR –Jester


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No. of Recommendations: 2
My Truck's Broke and so am I.

Uhura -- Jester
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No. of Recommendations: 3
Your Day Tradin' Days Are Over, Now That I Find Out You Wasn't Meanin' Stocks
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No. of Recommendations: 3
I just wanted to get lucky and all I got was a pack of Lucky's

and the Flip-side

You ain't my momma, and bring me a beer

Chris – Jester (BTIOA)
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No. of Recommendations: 1
My Thoughts Of You Are Like Kudzu
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No. of Recommendations: 1
Like Hee Haw, You Ain't Coming' Back.

MichaelR --Jester

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No. of Recommendations: 0
I took you to school (and you took me to bed)
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No. of Recommendations: 0
6-packin 4-wheelin blues
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No. of Recommendations: 11
"I'm So Miserable Without You, It's Like Having You Here"

and on the flip side:

"If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now"


Woolsey

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No. of Recommendations: 4
"Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye"


Woolsey

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No. of Recommendations: 2
The Cell Just Ain't The Same Now That You've Been Paroled
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No. of Recommendations: 5
When You Changed My Tires, You Changed My Life.....I See Goodyears From Now On
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No. of Recommendations: 1
NAFTA was good but why'd they export my sister to Canada?

Randall
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No. of Recommendations: 0
NASCAR, the WWF, and you
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No. of Recommendations: 3
I Got Tears In My Ears From Laying On My Back And Crying In My Sleep Over You.
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No. of Recommendations: 1
She Left With The Gold, I'm Left With The Shaft
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Give Yer Ex Enough Rope And She'll Take That Too
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Mah Pick-Up's Got A Big Block And My Mah He's Got A Big...Family
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No. of Recommendations: 0
It's Them Low Down, Dirty Dog, Trailer Trash, DNF Blues
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No. of Recommendations: 2
Ole Dale May Be Gone But His Soul Is In My Truck
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Hidin' The Moonshine Where The Sun Don't
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Six-Fingered, Corn Likkered, Banjo Strummin' Fool.
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No. of Recommendations: 1
When You Mooned Me That Night and I Saw My Name Right There, I Knew That You Loved Me
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No. of Recommendations: 5
It's Been Lonesome in the Saddle Since My Horse Died


DIMP
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No. of Recommendations: 1
Why Oh Why Don't You Choose Some Other Guy To Be Your Bride
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No. of Recommendations: 4
From the latest C/W album by N. U. Endo:

I got me a Hummer, but it ain't no SUV

I'd like to thank you for giving me a hand

I was well on my way when the cops broke down the door

It ain't over till I fall asleep

When I woke up, I was broke, sticky and confused

It ain't my shoes he'll have to fill

I'd like to buy you breakfast if you'd just tell me your name

Would you mind if we just didn't talk?

Is that what you call love? We ain't even done.

Chris – Jester (BTIOA!)
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No. of Recommendations: 0
She Was Cuter Than A Pup Under A Little Red Wagon But She Still Took Me For A Ride
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No. of Recommendations: 1
Her Daddy Had A Shotgun
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No. of Recommendations: 2
She Warnt No Electrician's Daughter But She Shocked Me Just The Same
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Her Daddy Was A Banker And Her Mom Was A Baton Twirler So She Took My Money And Split
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No. of Recommendations: 0
My Dog Died And I Cried

~jscott - jester
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No. of Recommendations: 6
Something a bit different...The Motley Fool, Country & Western Style:


STAND BY YOUR PLAN

Sometimes it's hard just gettin' debt free
Givin' all your money to the credit card man
Oh, you're having bad times payin' for all those good times
Cuttin' back in any way you can.

Hey, but if you charged it, you gotta repay it
Even when you don't think you can
And if you repay it, be proud of it
Then after that, start investin' all you can.

Stand by your PLAN
and the debt-free dream we cling to
TMF is the place to come to
When you are broke and lonely

Stand by your PLAN
And tell the world, CASH ONLY
Keep rollin' all the change you can
Stand by your PLAN
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No. of Recommendations: 6
"I Only Drink,Cause It Makes you Purty"

*JR*
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No. of Recommendations: 1
"I Won Three Winston Cups and She Still Won't Let Me Fool Around."

Of course, that record only spins counter-clockwise.

5Speed
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No. of Recommendations: 0
This one is REAL (I wrote it):

"My Ex Gave Me One Dozen Roses....It Wasn't Love,It Was Psychosis"

*JR*
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No. of Recommendations: 3
You're Just a Pop-Top (in the Six-Pack of My Mind)

BK
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No. of Recommendations: 2
"(I WISH YOUR HEAD WAS) BETWEEN A ROCK AND A HARD PLACE"

Diane
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No. of Recommendations: 0
"The Sheep are Looking Better (Since You Left Me)"

Diane
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No. of Recommendations: 2
"Just a Pinch Between Your Cheek and Gum (is where I want to be)"

Diane

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No. of Recommendations: 0
"How Can You Be Sure Your Mother wasn't Inbred?"

Diane
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No. of Recommendations: 5
There's a "Dear John" on my John Deer.
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No. of Recommendations: 0
"Mama Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Trade Enron"

Diane

(okay, so maybe this should have been a Challenge 39A: Altered C/W Song Titles) :-)
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No. of Recommendations: 1



Meetin' You at the Family Reunion Put Cuzzin' Phil Out of My Mind Fer Good
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No. of Recommendations: 0
I still rue the day they took my doppels away
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No. of Recommendations: 3

You Ain't My Cousin So We Ain't Gettin' Married

Pull My Finger And Hold A Flaming Zippo To My Butt

She Told Me To Take Out The Trash, So I'm Dating Her Sister

My Sister's Pregnant And It Ain't My Fault This Time

I Got Hemorrhoids And They're All Named Rae-Ann

It Hurts When I Pee And You're To Blame

A Tornado Got My Trailer (Again)


Wada


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No. of Recommendations: 0
Hate to say it, raggmopp, but Jerry Reed actually had a hit with "She got the goldmine, and I got the Shaft"

Truth is stramger that DIMP's sense of humor....

KY Hawkeye--Jester....BEWARE THE IDES OF APRIL!!!!!!!!!
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Hate to say it, raggmopp, but Jerry Reed actually had a hit with "She got the goldmine, and I got the Shaft"
===*===

Well that's no surprise, I'd heard that title somewhere before I just didn't realize that it was a "real one". I think "Tears in my ears" might actually be legit too.
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No. of Recommendations: 0
Hate to say it, raggmopp, but Jerry Reed actually had a hit with "She got the goldmine, and I got the Shaft"
===*===

Well that's no surprise, I'd heard that title somewhere before I just didn't realize that it was a "real one". I think "Tears in my ears" might actually be legit too.


Tear in My Beer/Hank Williams, Sr.

There's a tear in my beer
'cause I'm cryin' for you,
dear you are on my lonely mind.
Into these last nine beers
I have shed a million tears.
You are on my lonely mind
I'm gonna keep on sittin' here
until I'm petriified.
And then maybe these tears
will leave my eyes.
There's a tear in my beer
'cause I'm crying' for you, dear
You are on my lonely mind.

Last night I walked the floor
and the night before
You are on my lonely mind.
It seems my life is through
and I'm so doggone blue
You are on my lonely mind.
I'm gonna keep on sittin' here
till I can't move a toe
and then maybe my heart
won't hurt me so.
There's a tear in my beer
'cause I'm cryin' for you, dear.
You are on my lonely mind.

Lord, I've tried and I've tried
But my tears I can't hide
You are on my lonely mind.
All these blues that I've found
Have really got me down
You are on my lonely mind
I'm gonna keep on drinkin' till I can't even think
Cause in the last week I ain't slept a wink
There's a tear in my beer
"cause I'm crying for you dear
You are on my lonely mind.
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No. of Recommendations: 0
I think "Tears in my ears" might actually be legit too.

Yes.

Some of the funniest are actually real.

My personal favorite - also real:

"Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goalposts in the Sky"

And they just love it where I live.

*Sigh*
Klash, who has absolutely nothing against Jesus and bets He's laughing too....
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No. of Recommendations: 0
"Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goalposts in the Sky"
===*===

SUM!CH, it's real. Though I'd heard it as "Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through the Goal Post of Life."

OT follows

Klash, who has absolutely nothing against Jesus and bets He's laughing too....
===*===

There used to be this picture floating around of Christ riant which was an absolute hoot! THAT'S my guy.

Raggmopp
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