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Hi all!

I looked at the FAQ for this group, but didn't find any helpful info regarding a potential situation in my future. Here's my situation:

I am ready to "pop the question" to my girlfriend. However, I know that my financial situation is drastically different from hers, and I am wondering how it will affect our eventual marriage. I have a squeeky clean credit record. I've never missed a payment on credit cards or my car loan, I never carry a balance on any card, and I've only bounced a check once due to an miscalculation on my part. The only debt I have is a car loan, which I am paying off regularly and on time. I have just over 3 years left on the car loan. I have no mortgage, as I am renting from a friend of mine. Credit card companies continually increase my limits, hoping that I'll spend more. I don't fall for it though! :) Now, here's where it gets interesting!

My girlfriend has approx. $26,000 in credit card debt (department store cards, as well as Visas and MC's)! The department store cards I know we can take care of easily enough, but there multiple other cards that have thousands of dollars each on them (also with very high interest rates). Currently, she has been bad about paying the minimum payment each month, which obviously will be reflected in her credit report. She does not have any other loans or debt (no car loan or mortgage).

My question is: should we decide to get married soon, how will her somewhat bad credit history affect my clean record? Will it be more difficult for us to get another car loan, or maybe an eventual home loan? I don't want us to be in a tough financial situation after the honeymoon is over. :) Also, should she consider closing all her accounts and consolidate her debt? It seems to me that consolidating would make it easier for us to make a single monthly payment for a number of years than to try and individually close each credit card account on it's own. Does anyone have any personal experience in a situation like this, or recommend on how to proceed or who to contact?

I really would like for us to have a stable financial future, and I feel that confronting her pile of debt is the first step to a happy and Foolish life together. Thanks!
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No. of Recommendations: 1
<< My question is: should we decide to get married soon, how will her somewhat bad credit history affect my
clean record? Will it be more difficult for us to get another car loan, or maybe an eventual home loan? I
don't want us to be in a tough financial situation after the honeymoon is over. :) Also, should she consider
closing all her accounts and consolidate her debt? It seems to me that consolidating would make it easier
for us to make a single monthly payment for a number of years than to try and individually close each credit
card account on it's own. Does anyone have any personal experience in a situation like this, or recommend
on how to proceed or who to contact? >>

You've come to the right place. This is almost identical to the situation I had with my girlfriend (now my wife).

Let me try to make this as short and sweet as possible (you can always email me with more detailed questions).

1) Her negative credit history should not have any adverse impact upon yours, TO THE EXTENT that her poor credit arises out of accounts that she was soley liable for. This remains true even after you are married. Joint credit card accounts (or other extentions of credit), on the other hand are a different story.

So, you, using your own stellar credit history, you can get lines of credit (for home, car, CC, etc.)unaffected by her.

As for her, if she can consolidate her outstanding balances under one line of credit (or consolidation loan) with a decently low rate of interest, go for it! It makes you bills cheaper (and only one bill to pay, which makes it more conveniant). Hope this helps!

Fool On,
D.P.

P.S. I assume you two will probably be sharing a number of bank accounts, credit cards, etc. Just keep in mind that it is your good credit that will be keeping you two "afloat" creditwise (until her credit gets better in any case). So make sure you keep all joint accounts paid up.
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No. of Recommendations: 6
Hi hripko,

I've been haunting the CC board for quite some time and there have been more than a few posts about marital strife between couples with different money habits. There have been a few sob stories by poor Fools who have been left footing the bill when their deadbeat spouses ran out on them. I even recall a post where one Fool was forced into bankruptcy by an out-of-control ex-spouse.

Technically, you shouldn't be liable for any debt that is not in your name. In practice, however, you'll both bear the burden of your collective debt. You're very noble to suggest tackling your debt together (I say because you said "...would make it easier for us to make a ... payment"). However, before you even think of marriage or mixed finances, you need to have The Talk with your girlfriend about money. You've given us no reason to think that the same habits that got your girlfriend $26k in the hole aren't still there, and all of your determination and good faith won't help if she torpedoes your plans with continued spending.

I'm sure you'll get more good advice from some of the other fine Fools on this board. In the meantime, here are a couple recent threads for you to read through:

So incredibly frustrated at spouse I could scream
http://boards.fool.com/Message.asp?id=1040004004746000&sort=id

Credit Cards and Marriage
http://boards.fool.com/Message.asp?id=1040004004800000&sort=id

Best of luck, Fool!
SpeleoFool.
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So, you, using your own stellar credit history, you can get lines of credit (for home, car, CC, etc.)unaffected by her.

This is true, BUT I beleive if you want a house loan and need both of your income to qualify for the loan, then her credit will be looked at and it can have an effect on qualifing and the interest rate you will have to pay.

If you can qualify on just your income alone, then you won't have a problem getting the home loan.

You might want to consider what kind of spending habits and behavior she has had in the past to bring her so much credit card debt and will this be a problem years down the road. This is a lot of credit card debt!

Utahtea



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I wouldn't be in a big old hurry to marry. This debt doesn't even include a nice vehicle? How much is a minimum payment for these bills? What is she going to consolidate on if she has no equity in a home or anything else of value?

What do you spend 26 thousand dollars on?

I got a accident settlement a little over a year ago for about that much money and have paid lots of bills, bought lots of stocks, and am still supporting myself on the SAME money.

This includes 3 vehicles. No we are not talking Dodge Vipers, but they have lots of insurance on them, and they get to the grocery store and back safely.

Again, I wouldn't be in a hurry to marry. If you don't marry, no one can lay claim to YOUR assets.

Love is fine, but keep your wallet in mind also.

wdg:>

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No. of Recommendations: 5
I am in the same situation, only I am the bride-to-be, and it is my groom-to-be who has the debt.

What you have to gauge is: Does she understand what her credit is like and why...? Does she want to change it? What will she do to change it? And then help her to do what it takes.

When I was first getting serious with my fiance, we had a long talk about money. He is a smart guy... but at the time he racked up the debt, he didn't understand how credit cards worked. Sure, he could've done the math, but that was so abstract. He figured that as long as he could make the monthly payments, he was fine. He wasn't thinking about the future in financial terms, and it's a good thing: at the time, he was in a field that is completely undervalued and underpaid.

He had gotten a better job making more money, and that he was happier with. Somewhere in there, he started dating me, too. : ) After we uncovered that bit about his debt, I sat him down and talked with him. Showed him fool.com and he read some of the articles. I sent away for the free investment guide (awhile back) and gave it to him. I showed him what I was doing with MY money, and why, and how it had grown. He was impressed, and he got interested in fixing his own situation!

In the meantime, he suffered a job lay-off. This happened after I moved across the state for him and took a pay-cut of my own. He had those high minimum cc payments, and hardly a way to pay them back. Those unemployment checks were looking good, and the ccs were a menace. Luckily, by this time he was convinced of the need to pay them down ASAP. This bad luck only served to drive home to him what he had done to sabotage his own future, and now his present.

The good news is that we both quickly found better jobs for more money, and are both getting in shape financially. He has gotten his interest rates on his ccs lowered. We use my Discover with "cash back" and pay it off every month. He never uses his accounts, and all but one are closed. He transferred a good percentage of his debt into a personal loan at a slightly better interest rate. He's even paid off the last bit of his car!!! Now he has only 4 bills to pay instead of 8 or 10.

I have to admit that a small percentage of his debt is due to the engagement ring he bought me. That was not a LBYM decision, but we are both very happy with it and willing to accept a slightly later pay-off date so that he could give me this ring.

We've been together just over a year now, and he is so much better off. Even in an emergency, he'd be in good financial shape. And now we have each other, which helps. We are planning our wedding, and while he pays of his ccs and personal loan, I am paying off my master's degree, my economical car, and saving money for our future. (I have no cc debt of my own.)

Hopefully your good sense will rub off on your girlfriend, and she will see the value of getting her finances in order. If she can't, I'd say you have a serious conflict of interest.... but if you love her and she loves you, I hope you will find common ground. It really has to come from her, though. It takes a lot of work and a long time, but it WILL get better, and she will be able to tract her progress every month for positive reinforcement. Watch those balances go down!

--AF
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No. of Recommendations: 13
My comments are more on the relationship side than the finance side, so feel free to ignore or to use the frowning-face button.

Your fiancee's situation is just that -- her situation. She lived it, and she's living with the consequences.

I believe in the future; one of my favorite mottos is "speramus meliora" ("we hope for better things"). That said, I think it's ill-advised to enter a long-term relationship thinking you're going to change the other party. (I'm not implying that you're saying this, but it is an inference I made.)

"I feel that confronting her pile of debt is the first step..."

I don't see in your post anything about how SHE feels, and that's the reason I'm writing.

From your description, she habitually overspends and doesn't worry much about the consequences. Imagine that you did marry, and two years from now she's still in debt and her attitude toward that state is unchanged. How are YOU feeling?

I'm not saying get rid of her. I'm saying talk to her (again) about the situation. More than once. If you spend more time talking about the wedding and reception than you do about how you'll handle finances, then you're talking about the wrong subjects.

I'm going out on a limb, but since you raise the question here, there's a chance you're unsure how to approach the subject with her. Two suggestions:

Start with your viewpoint, not hers. Be candid, open, and as unthreatening as you can be. Consider using what counselors call "I" statements rather than "you" ones. E.g., "I'm worried about how we will handle financial questions," rather than "You spend way more than I would."

Second, start with feelings rather than beliefs. That's an extension of the "be open" above. If her financial behavior makes you uncomfortable, you can acknowledge that discomfort without gaveling a judgment on her. One hint: to make sure you're talking about feelings, never use the word "that" after the word "feel."

"I feel that" means, basically, "I think." Example: "I feel that you're not listening..."

If you can change "I feel" to "I am," you're on the right track.

"I feel scared if I'm carrying any debt...."
("I'm scared if..")
"I feel reluctant to bring this up..."

The amount of debt doesn't matter, I don't think, as much as the reasons for accumulating it, her feelings about it now, and her own desire to be in charge of her life. At the risk of being told to move to a "relationship" board, "debt" here matters only insofar as it's a difference between the two of you that is troubling to one party.

As the two of your talk about your own hopes for the future, you'll learn more about each other. Openness and trust, on both sides, will help each of you come to the right decision about life, including life together.

Hoping for better things,
Dave
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<< This is true, BUT I beleive if you want a house loan and need both of your income to qualify for the loan, then her credit will be
looked at and it can have an effect on qualifing and the interest rate you will have to pay.

If you can qualify on just your income alone, then you won't have a problem getting the home loan. >>

Thank you for clarifying my earlier post, now that I think back I was afraid this nuance was left unaddressed. :)

I guess the overall point I was trying to make is that you, as individual, do not "marry into" a bad credit rating :)

Fool On,
D.P.
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I know that my financial situation is drastically different from hers, and I am wondering how it will affect our eventual marriage.

Hello hripko,
First off, I want to let you know that one of the most important first steps has already been taken. What, you may ask? Both of you are aware of the other person's basic financial situation. This is very important. Having said that, it would be a good idea to MAKE SURE that nothing is left out, but even BEGINNING to discuss the issue is a big step for most people who have significant credit card debt.

You ask whether her crazy credit history will affect your ability to borrow as a couple in the future. The answer to this is YES, it will undoubtedly. Fortunately you both don't have a lot of credit problems, so you shouldn't be totally shut out of all the car loans and mortgages and things. However, it is likely that you will pay higher interest rates or be able to borrow less.

I have some thoughts on this subject. My boyfriend has a lot more debt than I do. Only $4000 is on Credit Cards, but when you add in his car and his school loans, the number approaches $40K. Six months ago, we started having regular discussions about his financial situation and priorities and things, and I began imparting Foolish principles to him. Today he saves regularly (not much, but some), pays EVERYTHING on time, and recently transferred his 18% and 21% credit card debt to a card that has a 2.9% teaser rate and then a 12.9% fixed rate thereafter. He is much more knowledgeable and open about financial matters, and I couldn't be more proud of his efforts. This is an ONGOING process. You will probably need to have one meaty, initial discussion about your financial goals and strategies, but please don't let that be the only words said. If you are open and honest about your financial situation and your goals are in line, your marriage will be far more likely to succeed.

Now, on another note, I am certain after the two of you begin talking more openly about these subjects, you will begin thinking about better options for carrying the debt until it is paid off. It is possible that your girlfriend/fiancee will be able to capitalize on your good credit by lowering interest rates if some of her debt is transferred to your cards. I personally would think twice about doing this until you are married, but it is an option. (My boyfriend and I discussed this and for now have decided against it). If you really think it would be best to transfer over some debt to your cards, perhaps it would be a good idea to transfer only an amount that your girlfriend can pay off over the course of a couple of months, and then repeat the process. That way, if she bails you won't have $26K on YOUR cards that SHE should be paying for. As far as her spotty payment record is concerned, I have a suggestion for that too. Sit down and do billpaying together. My boyfriend and I do this, and it seems to work. Every month, I look at his checkbook balance, what he will get paid, and the fixed payments that are due. Then I suggest an amount that he can put into savings and an amount to put toward his CC debts. He gets paid monthly, and sometimes it is 3 weeks after he gets paid that a bill will come due, but I encourage him to write as many of the checks up-front as possible so that he knows the amount he has to work with for the rest of the month.

Well, I've rambled on WAY too long. I hope this has helped.

diana

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No. of Recommendations: 6
Dear H,

Congratulations on your desire to pop the question. Now, for the voice of reality.
Saying "I do" is not going to magically change your girlfriend's spending habits. They, like all habits (bad and good) come with the whole package.

So, let not rose-tinted glasses of engagement bliss cloud your thinking. The bills will still be there the morning after the wedding. It doesn't matter in which name the debt was incurred. Once you are married it goes from being "your" problem to "our" problem. And let me say this right up front. If you get divorced there will be a "fair division" of debts just like assets. No matter how romantic the courtship, wedding, and marriage, most states view a marriage like a legal partnership. There are legal repercussions for both parties in the event of a dissolution.

Ok, so you think I'm harsh. Maybe. I've been married and divorced and remarried. I learned the hard way not to take something like finances for granted. It IS important to the health and well-being of a marriage and doubly so if you are launching a new marriage. So pay attention. This isn't romantic but its necessary.

First, you and your lady need to have a serious heart-to-heart about the spending. What's the deal? Is she spending because she can? Has no one ever held her accountable for her money? Is shopping her "fix" for a bad day? It's important for you to know what's behind the debt. Some people drink. Some smoke. Some do drugs to "escape" life's disappointments. What's she escaping from?

Second, get thee to a good financial counselor. It's great if you want to tackle the problem with her, but you need a solid, objective, and realistic plan for taking care of the debt. PLUS, you need to address the root of the problem: her spending habits. Her debt will never go away if she keeps spending. You may think your love and affection will cure her ills, but she's got a habit and like all addicts its tough to kick. So a plan is essential to for success now and later. She needs to be accountable to someone other than you. (Plus, it will be easier on your marriage).

Third, take advantage of any pre-maritial counseling available to you whether thru a church or synagouge or a private marriage counselor. This doesn't mean you're planning on a divorce but it is good to address the issues - like money, kids, in-laws, - before you walk down the aisle. Oh, I know it's not romantic! That's beside the point. You won't regret it. Trust me.

Finally, speaking from a practical point of view, don't co-mingle any funds for the time being. Keep separate checking and savings accounts, credit cards, and loans. While it may be true your spouse's debt shouldn't figure into your credit rating, if you go to borrow for a house in a year or two or introduce a child into your life, things could get interesting. A bank may not be so understanding given your girlfriend's track record.

I think depending on the advice of a financial counselor, it is wise to take the practical steps of closing accounts and finding lower interest rates for her existing debt. Be supportive but don't' start writing checks every month to cover her hindend. She has to learn to be responsible for her own finances. If you bail her out in the name of love, you enable her to keep spending and never face the music. That may come home to roost later.

I wish you well. Marriage is a truly wonderful thing. Give yourselves an honest start and you'll go the distance. I learned from my mistakes. I hope you don't have to do the lessons over.

Good luck.


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No. of Recommendations: 9
I was in the same situation you were. When I met my now wife, I had flawless credit, a condo, new car, etc.

Now, 7 year later, I owe over $50k in CC debt, $20k in other debts, no condo, no cars, etc. My credit is shot and I'm facing lawsuits and bankruptcy.

The problem is that her spending habits and demands did not change. I ended up sacrificing my fiscal health to save my marriage. My mistake was not learning until it was too late that her financial problems were symptoms of deeper problems.

To this day she has refused to work, attempt a budget, or look at a check register or bill. I've given up on any hope of reform.

You need to find out what direction she is headed with her debt. Is it because she wasn't paying attention, or is it because of deeper problems? Can she be reformed?

Otherwise she will end up draining your financial resources instead of augmenting them.

Good luck.
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dear hripko,

I can only say I agree with the posters who advise you to be afraid, be very afraid of entering a marriage with someone who carries this kind of debt, now has problems making the minimum payments and, by all accounts (yours) appears to have said little to nothing about changing her ways.

Please be careful. If, like AliFool's fiance, your girlfriend can learn to change her ways, then you will have a solid foundation of understanding about money and marriage. If not, you will go the way of cable666.

Good luck. Let us know how it goes.
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Great Foolish replies- I'm back for the last word.

Please learn from our bad movies, don't rerun them.

I have learned a new Latin phrase and didn't even have to pay an attorney!

Is the bride-to-bed an Internet user? Hey..maybe you can provide the link to these responses. She's not the kind to grab a frying pan or rolling pan for administration is she?

She could go see the lovely credit card board and get more great advice.

I still say be cautious...but good luck :>
wdg
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Is the bride-to-bed an Internet user? Hey..maybe you can provide the link to these responses. She's not the kind to grab a frying pan or
rolling pan for administration is she?


Bride-to-bed??? Am I missing some humor here?
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Must be that darn cataract!!

Good catch John!

Bride to BE of course

Oops...

wdg :>
Red face for Easter...
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If you want to skip the testimony, go directly to the 'SO, WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME' section.

I was in a situation similar to yours in that I was in love with a man who stood to cost me a fortune in time. When he asked me to marry him, I thought it was appropriate to do an assessment. I determined that he was always going to be expensive.

I ran up debt in an effort to appease him. I gave him presents to make him 'happy.' I treated him to dinner and drinks to get him out of his frequent bad moods. We went shopping together because it was 'fun.' Staying home to save money was not fun. Living on a budget did not make him happy. The mantra became 'Got to feed the beast. Have to eat the Visa.'

When I got laid off, he didn't take his turn in paying for me. In fact, the night I got laid off I told him that I don't have any more money to spend on going out. Despite that, when we went out with our friends - he outright ignored me because I was sullen (from the shame of being unemployed) and because I wasn't buying any drinks. My friends consoled me with their looks of pity and his friends avoided me with furtive glances, adding to the shame. I was humiliated.

[In reading this, ask yourself: if you stopped paying for your girlfriend, would she treat you the same way as above? Would she be angry with you for not being willing or able to afford her? Would she feel responsible to reciprocate your generousity? Would she be determined to encourage you and support your efforts? Or would she be vengeful for your 'failure' to maintain her lifestyle?]

Figuring I had nothing more to lose - my job, my boyfriend, my dignity, I dumped him. I lived in limbo for a while and with loneliness for longer, but never did I doubt having made the best decision. Three months later, I started both a new job and my Cash Diet to pay off my debt. The thoughts below keep me entertained (thinking is free!) when I have my doubts.

SO, WHAT IF I MARRYING A MONEY PIT?
1. The quality of every day life.
When two people anticipate a future together, all aspects good and bad must be considered. That's because all things good and bad happen to each of us throughout a life time. How you manage the good times and how you respond to the bad times determines what type of person you are. Some people are simply 'Capable' of living a life of integrity and some people are 'Not.' Feeling no compunction to repay debts puts one clearly in the category of 'Not.'

2. The quality of your friends.
As a couple, do you want to be in Capable Crew of Comfort or in the Incapable Cast of Misfits? A couple shares an identity because they share their life. And they share their life with friends. In selecting friends, do you want them to be successes or failures. Successes do not befriend Losers (too much risk) and Losers do not befriend Successes (too much envy).

3. The quality of your marraige.
A person who is fiscally responsible by paying off debts and living below one's means exhibits maturity because they are able to delay gratification. A person who feels entitled to every indulgence, without regard to consequences, reveals their immaturity because they thrive impulsively on instant gratification.

Think about what this difference in values means to a marriage. An impulsive person will meet their immediate needs that will eventually be discoverd by their patient spouse. The spouse feels violated and vulnerable. Violated because the impulsive spouse indulged in a joy only with themselves (over spending) and didn't share in that joy with their spouse. Vulnerable because the impulsive spouse threatens the financial security of a patient spouse whose outlook requires financial security to be happy.

The impulsive spouse (them) gets 'caught' and a loud, intensely mean fight ensues with the patient spouse (you).
- The impulsive spouse accuses you of being controlling, which among the weak is grounds for divorce. You are threatened with divorce and that would ruin you financially. They know you can't afford this.
- Then you are called oppressive, black hearted, and mean spirited because you don't want them to be happy. Shopping makes them happy. You make them un-happy.
- And then they call you boring, dreadfully stiff because you are no fun. Shopping is fun.
- Then you are called classless and tacky because you wouldn't have the good sense to buy what all they bought.
- Then you are called unattractive because you don't have what all they have that makes them more attractive than you.
- Then it is revealed you are unintelligent because you don't have the resources they do in finding all the good deals. They read the fashion magazines and you don't.
- Then they declare you are unpopular because nobody would like you if not for them. All your freinds are their friends, they remind you. (Your freinds are too uncool).
- They call you unsuccessful because your career is stalled. They refuse to help advance your career to punish you for judging them. When forced to mingle with coworkers, you fear what new way they will sabotage your good standing.
- Lastly, they call you unfit because of the high blood pressure, rapid weight gain, and persistent cough you've developed since marrying.

In sum: You need the help because without them, you would be living alone in a cold cave with barely a candle lit. The dim light would obscure just how ugly you've become, which is fine because nobody likes you anyway.

You quit. They win. The bile crawls from your stomach, up your throat, and stings the back of your nose.

You can't live like this, but you can't afford to leave either. You stay married and wish for a sudden death. You lose your friends (correction: they are THEIR friends, not yours) because you are miserable company. And you lose your job because not only are you not productive, but you aren't respected either.

4. The quality of your children.
Indulgent, undisciplined people have indulgent, undisciplined children. I see a large screen TV with two fat children in front, killing each other in a game of DeathMatch IV, screaming at you to shut up when you tell them they should be doing their homework and taking their Prozac, telling you to move out of the way of their TV when you try to turn it off. They hurl at you the same insults made frequently by the impulsive spouse.

5. The quality of your retirement.
You won't retire. You can't afford to. You spend the rest of your life supporting the impulisve wife and impetuous children because you could never afford to leave in the first place.

You asked if you should marry this girl with 26K in credit card debt. You posed a very difficult question.

Ask yourself first, am I entitled to a good life or do I earn it? Then ask your girlfriend the same question. Next, ask how you are going to live it. Entitlement is a one line answer (starting with 'You....'). Earning it gives rise to a lengthy discussion, peppered with tales of introspection. Enjoy the talk.
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The impulsive spouse (them) gets 'caught' and a loud, intensely mean fight ensues with the patient spouse (you).
- The impulsive spouse accuses you of being controlling, which among the weak is grounds for divorce. You are threatened with divorce and that would ruin you financially. They know you can't afford this.
- Then you are called oppressive, black hearted, and mean spirited because you don't want them to be happy. Shopping makes them happy. You make them un-happy.
- And then they call you boring, dreadfully stiff because you are no fun. Shopping is fun.
- Then you are called classless and tacky because you wouldn't have the good sense to buy what all they bought.
- Then you are called unattractive because you don't have what all they have that makes them more attractive than you.
- Then it is revealed you are unintelligent because you don't have the resources they do in finding all the good deals. They read the fashion magazines and you don't.
- Then they declare you are unpopular because nobody would like you if not for them. All your freinds are their friends, they remind you. (Your freinds are too uncool).
- They call you unsuccessful because your career is stalled. They refuse to help advance your career to punish you for judging them. When forced to mingle with coworkers, you fear what new way they will sabotage your good standing.
- Lastly, they call you unfit because of the high blood pressure, rapid weight gain, and persistent cough you've developed since marrying.


This is so dead on right it is giving me the chills! Do you know my ex?
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You don't *have* to have joint accounts or pay off your spouse's debts. My husband and I keep all our money separate. But, fortunately for us, we still have fairly harmonious ideas about spending and saving, and both of us are on the path toward financial security (though due to many advantages I've had, I'm farther along than he is.)

How you treat your money goes to the very core of your values. All of us make mistakes while we're young and susceptible to peer and marketing pressures. But a mature person learns to look to their future and take responsibility for their own well-being.

You can't make this journey for another person. All you can hope to do is serve as a good example and maybe offer some advice, ONLY if it's asked for! And think very, very hard before joining your life with someone who isn't concerned about the future and able to be self-reliant.

$26,000 can be paid down, given time and discipline. But the person has to want to do it.
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Be smart. Dump her.



Get to know eakina, who wrote the post just before yours that has 84 recs at present:





<<<<Why should the lowest income folks be burdened with income tax? They already pay a disproportionate percent in the sales tax most states levy.
>>



http://boards.fool.com/Message.asp?mid=12442867







Seattle Pioneer
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Uh... Seattle?

Have you taken a trip in the Wayback Machine?
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Have you discussed long financial issues and goals? Her past issues are hers. You may have to be attentive to make certain that her past credit doesn't get accidentally reported on your credit history, but that can be handled.

If she hasn't changed her ways, it will keep you in debt for the rest of your life.

Debra
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This thread is 7 years old! Don't waste your time, y'all!

GS
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This thread is 7 years old! Don't waste your time, y'all!


The thread may be old, but the message is timeless and well worth the read!!

Karon
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