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Hey M.Read, eh!

Have you had/given, anymore interviews lately?

Maybe Paris Hilton, or, Steve Erwin?


I did one once with a snail. Would that substitute for one with Paris since the mental capacity of both is similar? And what would an erudite such as I have in common with someone whose bra size supersedes her IQ? Possibly we could talk about matters that concern us both yet my view is that a conversation on napkin folding wouldn't last that long or be that interesting once the second fold had been made.

The fact that Steve Erwin hasn't been eaten by crocodiles shows, once and for all, the discerning side of amphibious reptiles.

It could be that Paris is, underneath it all, a closet philosopher able to quote Kant and read Greek flawlessly yet I have my doubts about that. I have my doubts about almost all she does yet I hope she can remember to breathe without further, continual, instruction. I have it on authority that the person standing next to her is not her bodyguard but someone saying, “Breathe in, breathe out, breath in, breathe out,” and should that person drop dead so would Paris.


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