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I don't know, but I suspect this is related to iPhone settings on the iPhones. In Settings, go to Messages and check the "Send & Receive" section on both your phone and your wife's. Adjust if you wish.

Keep in mind if an iPhone user removes their email address anybody previously using that email address for texting, will no longer have contact until a new thread is started using the phone number.

Since I don't know how people connect with me (phone number or email), I allow both on my iOS devices and my Mac.
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