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I don't want to know it's normal, I want to know how to make it better for them.

Do you want a pleasant lie, or the ugly truth?

My two stepkids are 17 and 21. The games have been played for a decade now.

Here is the key to the problem as I see it. No boy wants to think badly of his father.
There will be brief shining moments that make it all worthwhile, really, but there will be no shortage of tears and pain and anger.

Sorry.

But you will have your self-respect and pride, and you will see your kids grow up into decent, productive human beings. But they will cry, and often for reasons that make you cry too.



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