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I know you said that not everyone choses "people with the traits of their parents' marriage that need to be solved and, in doing this, attempts to succeed in areas their parents' didn't" but I believe that many people choose to learn from their parents' mistakes and not repeat them.

My father is/was a philandering pediphilic bum. He held jobs for a while then quit them. He cheated on my mother. He abused at least one of his own children. He smoked.

I don't think I consciously chose his polar opposite, but I did marry a man very different. Non-smoker, high achiever, hard worker who has finished a 20 yr career in the military and is now in his second career. Is he perfect? Of course not, neither am I.

My point is, I have to believe that many people watch and learn as children, not to choose the same sort of person to somehow fix and rescue, but to choose someone who will provide a healthier relationship than the one they grew up in.

Always ;-)
Hunzi
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