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I've trusted the wrong people for the wrong reason, losing the chance to foster healthy bonds with others, often because I belatedly realized I was being actively manipulated or courted by my own previously established, biases, suspicions, expectations, and needs.

You're not alone! I've done all the same things myself. It's a hard lesson to learn. I think the relevant saying is,

Don't get into a bad place through PIP:
* Pride
* Impatience
* Projection

Gratefully recovering,
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