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hey all,

in reading the board today, i just realized we can't let imp and T get married next month.

See, one of the things that makes me chuckle the most on this board are the references to the "In-Sins".

If they get married, they won't be "In-sins" anymore. Thus, my amusement on this board will be greatly diminished.

*grin*.

d
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If they get married, they won't be "In-sins" anymore. Thus, my amusement on this board will be greatly diminished.

Suck it up.

A Las Vegas wedding ain't a real marriage anyway. She can still pretend she's living in sin.

*grin*

MOI
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It's going to be weird to have in-laws again.

Also? My name will be changing again. Weird.

impolite
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Also? My name will be changing again. Weird.

Heh.

I will always think of you as <current firstname, current lastname>.

I don't even think I know T's last name.

If it weren't for the fact that <current lastname> is DN's lastname I'd tell you to make T change his name. :D

d
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If it weren't for the fact that <current lastname> is DN's lastname I'd tell you to make T change his name. :D


I think if I had gone back to my maiden name with the divorce, I would not change it now. T doesn't care either way (his last name is the same as his biological father's, not the man who raised him and he calls "Dad", so he has no emotional attachment to his at all).

I just don't want DN's name any more, and I'd rather switch to T's than explain to everyone I ever meet from now on why I have one last name, my husband has another and my children have a third, if I took the opportunity to change it back to my maiden name now.

The New Feminism: convenience. ;)

impolite
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Also? My name will be changing again. Weird.



can I put in my vote to legally change it to impolite ?

or Beth, you kind of look like a Beth...


peace & names
t
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Once upon a time I was married and changed my last name to my husband's last name.

We divorced and I did NOT want my maiden name back.

I had a baby and argument ensued with the father as to what the baby's last name would be.

I'm not giving her my maiden name. Well, your maiden name is better than my last name. She's your kid and she should have your last name. Besides, it would be weird if we all three had different last names.

So, impette has same last name as daddy, but hates it. She likes my maiden name. She wants to change it when she is old enough.

In the meantime, I am referred to by school and medical personnel as Mrs. _____________ even though we were never married and that isn't my name! Makes me cringe.

Maybe I will change my last name at the same time as daughter to some new as yet unpicked name we can agree on.
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Maybe divorced chicks should start replacing their married slave names with an X, representing the unknown. They could keep the X until another man willing to give them an identity comes along.
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I'd rather switch to T's than explain to everyone I ever meet from now on why I have one last name, my husband has another and my children have a third


Wait. Don't your kids have DN's last name, too? That's only two names. </semantics>

I vote for you and T choosing a new, cool last name, like "Awesome" (TM Marshall and Lily on "How I Met Your Mother").

When i changed my last name to DH's, a big factor was that i could finally stop having to deal with going by my middle name*. New feminism indeed!








* going from "Extremely Snippee Trousers" to "Snippee Trousers Pants"
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When i changed my last name to DH's, a big factor was that i could finally stop having to deal with going by my middle name*. New feminism indeed!


Bonus I just thought of - T's name is very unusual, so now I'll have:

<Strange first name> <strange last name>

Instead of:

<strange first name> <extremely common last name>

As I have now and had with my maiden name as well.

It's not as good as <strange first name> Moonbeam, but it will do.

impolite
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Maybe divorced chicks should start replacing their married slave names with an X, representing the unknown. They could keep the X until another man willing to give them an identity comes along.


Weird, right?

impolite
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<secret unusual first name handshake>

Are you ever mistaken for a Mr. like i am? IIRC, your name - while unique - is pretty feminine.

My maiden name was pretty common and DH's last name isn't too unusual when said, but it's an uncommon variation. And even both the common spellings can be mangled-when-saying because of all those silent consonants the Gaelic peoples were so fond of.








PS - I was listening to an Adam Carolla podcast recently and he used the word (such as it is) "douchenozzle" and i laughed and laughed and laughed.
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IIRC, your name - while unique - is pretty feminine.

Yes, it is - so at least I have that going for me.

Are you ever mistaken for a Mr. like i am?

No, just as another race. Most who hear my name assume I am of one race, when I am on the opposite end of the spectrum. I think it's the combo of the unusual first name and the common-for-more-than-one-race last name. I got it some as a youth, too - my maiden name was also common-for-more-than-one-race, especially in the South. Friends would ask their parents if I could come over for a sleep over, and they would ask what color I was*.

I have been told, after being hired at a job, that the person originally passing along my resume assumed I was a different race, because of the name.

Our very own dianakalt thought I was, too! She got the shock of a lifetime the first time we met, when she moved her years ago. My name and description (height, weight, hair color) were generic enough there was really no telling who was showing up.

It's kinda funny, actually - because what they are expecting is totally, and completely, not what shows up.

PS - I was listening to an Adam Carolla podcast recently and he used the word (such as it is) "douchenozzle" and i laughed and laughed and laughed.

It's just so fitting. Perfect for him, really.

impolite

* This is in the South, which should help explain how in the world they found it to be an appropriate question
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No, just as another race. Most who hear my name assume I am of one race, when I am on the opposite end of the spectrum. I think it's the combo of the unusual first name and the common-for-more-than-one-race last name. I got it some as a youth, too - my maiden name was also common-for-more-than-one-race, especially in the South. Friends would ask their parents if I could come over for a sleep over, and they would ask what color I was*.


I do not understand how the name Mahleekwa Jackson denotes any particular race. I think those people must just be prejudiced.
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Maybe I will change my last name at the same time as daughter to some new as yet unpicked name we can agree on.


C and I use my maiden name, which I don't like. 1. because I don't have a great relationship with bio dad, 2. because the rest of the family I grew up in has step-dad's last name. But I don't want his last name, either.

I'm seriously considering changing mine when C is out of the house. She says she wants to keep what we currently have, which will certainly be up to her. I was thinking of using my great-grandmother's maiden name, because that's as far back as I know the female line, and I'd want to honor the women in my family, but C doesn't like it.

Ishtar
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Sometimes it is easy to understand how you and Seattle Pioneer never married.

This is definitely one of those times.

On the other hand, what you just wrote was funny as hell. Totally different from nearly anything SP ever posts.
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Totally different from nearly anything SP ever posts.

Amazing the difference a little irony makes.
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Maybe I am too subtle for this board.
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eudaimon6: "Sometimes it is easy to understand how you and Seattle Pioneer never married."

I had to backtrack this post to see which Fool dated SP.

WOW, was I ever surprised.

Regards, JAFO
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I've been meaning to ask, imp: How did your parents come up with your name? And does your sister have an equally unique (and culturally confusing) name?
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Dude, I was just kidding! Jeez!


--Booa
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I've been meaning to ask, imp: How did your parents come up with your name? And does your sister have an equally unique (and culturally confusing) name?

I'm not imp, but i THINK I can answer these questions.

If I recall correctly, her parents said they knew and liked someone with <unusual impolite firstname>. I don't think they made it up. I'm sure she'll confirm if I'm wrong on that.

As to her sister, Little Sis does not have an unusual or culturally confusing name. It's pretty normal.
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I think if I had gone back to my maiden name with the divorce, I would not change it now. T doesn't care either way (his last name is the same as his biological father's, not the man who raised him and he calls "Dad", so he has no emotional attachment to his at all).

I just don't want DN's name any more, and I'd rather switch to T's than explain to everyone I ever meet from now on why I have one last name, my husband has another and my children have a third, if I took the opportunity to change it back to my maiden name now.


BTDT. DH's surname is Polish/Ukrainian. When I first saw it, even though I had a portfolio of Polish clients and thought I was pretty good at pronouncing their names, I had to ask a Polish friend how to say it. When it became rapidly clear to me that he was "the one", I was left with a quandry: if I took his name, chances are I'd spend my working life saying "Sorry no Polish" (one of the few mangled phrases I know) and getting pissed off when my name was mispronounced again. But, I thought it was insulting to DH to keep the name I was known by - Dumbo's surname (as shown on my first foolname).

So, when the Divorce was finalized, I reverted to my maiden name, emailed all the colleagues on my contact list and then had the hilarity of getting emails back "Congratulations on getting married!". What part of "following my divorce..." didn't they read? (LOL!)

I do use DH's surname, but not at work, and not in any "official*" capacity. In fact, thanks to the Australian Passport Act 2005, I can't change my surname now without a load of rigmarole and a trip back to Oz (the Act requires an Australian marriage certificate or deed-poll certificate, nothing else is sufficient). Since I travel internationally for work, I need to keep my work name the same as the one in my passport.

- Pam (of the multiple identities)



* I may be telling a lie here: I can't remember what my name is on the electoral register. When we moved last time, it didn't need any documentation to register, just a form filled out.
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<secret unusual first name handshake>

Oooohh!! I need to learn this!

Are you ever mistaken for a Mr. like i am?

I actually have a trifecta

Extremely unusual first name, so very close to a common male name, that grade k-4 playground misery consisted of other small children insisting that I really was a boy, and grades 5-7 a teacher with a foreign accent had me and the 2 boys with the common, similar male name constantly being mistaken about who was actually being called on.

Into the bargain, my last name is very rare, even in the Netherlands, due to the family only having moved to the Netherlands in the 1500s to avoid being completely exterminated due to religious persecution in France.

Slightly amusing anecdote

When I was dating the VM's dad, who has an insanely common Dutch last name, his Dutch immigrant dad kept quizzing me at our first meeting and insisting that I couldn't be half Dutch as I didn't look Dutch (biracial ancestry anyone?), didn't sound Dutch (hello, born & raised in Toronto?) and he had never, ever heard of my last name.

All through the evening, he just would not let up and kept returning to the topic as though he would eventually catch me out in a lie. Finally, he asked me if I spoke any Dutch. I said that the only words I knew were Meisje,(little miss), Dag (Hello and goodbye) and the things my father said when he hit his thumb with a hammer. With a triumphantly, challenging manner he insisted that I tell him what that was. I let loose with a string of perfectly pronounced Dutch swearing that by English translation is quite mild (variations on Jeebus & GD-it with special references to heat) but in Dutch culture is a big, big, hairy deal (My grandmother would always look very pained if she overheard my dad do it)

His face blanched. He took my hand and looked deep in my eyes and said "Nice girls like you shouldn't talk like that!" and from that moment on I was the favoured one for years.
Bizarre!

whoopica
needing handshake instructions
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I decided I will change my name for 3 reasons:

1. I've dreamed my entire life of moving up the alphabet.
2. I've currently got the lovely ie/ei combination that no one can figure out how to pronounce correctly, plus the new name is 1 syllable.
2. Current job cuts my email address off in my last name and it's annoying to spell the entire name and then provide the cut-off email. "My name is Soup Wunderbar, but my email address is swunderb@company.com"

Soup
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If I recall correctly, her parents said they knew and liked someone with <unusual impolite firstname>. I don't think they made it up.

This is correct - they swear they knew someone named this. I haven't ever seen proof, but that is what they claim. Also, I have been told, when people have heard my name, that they will name a daughter that if they have one. So for all I know, there are children running about saying "they *say* they knew someone named that when they were kids, but I don't have any proof", too.

As to her sister, Little Sis does not have an unusual or culturally confusing name. It's pretty normal.

Yep. I think this is partly because my name wasn't chosen because it was unique, simply because they liked it (if that makes sense) AND because Little Sis was born at 28 weeks, give or take - she just came too early for them to have a name picked out yet. She was named quickly, and with a common Biblical name.

On the same vein, Q got his name because we got that far in the alphabet before we hit on a name we both liked.

impolite
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Also, I have been told, when people have heard my name, that they will name a daughter that if they have one.


Me, too! I am usually so flattered that i don't even have the "Should i tell them what a pain in the arse this name is?" dilemma until later.

I am getting better about holding my tongue whenever people tell me they plan to call their child by his/her middle name.
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I have been told, when people have heard my name, that they will name a daughter that if they have one.
==========================================================

Me, too!



this reminds me of the ebay guy who said in his feedback, that he would name his firstborn after you, and laugh ...


peace & naming
t
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This is correct - they swear they knew someone named this. I haven't ever seen proof, but that is what they claim. Also, I have been told, when people have heard my name, that they will name a daughter that if they have one. So for all I know, there are children running about saying "they *say* they knew someone named that when they were kids, but I don't have any proof", too.


My daughter could say the same thing about her name. I gave her an unusual spelling based on someone I knew before I got pregnant with her and whom I never ran across again.

MOI
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I gave [my daughter] an unusual spelling based on someone I knew before I got pregnant with her and whom I never ran across again.


Ooh! Here's a story about a named-baby-for-random-stranger-with-appealing-moniker that beat the odds...


Ten years ago, my friend J was visiting Mt. St. Helen's and met a young woman working there named Hayden (usually a boy's name). J loved it so much, she swore if she ever had a girl, she'd name her Hayden.

A few years later, J and husband then moved to Ohio and proceeded to have three kids, one of which is a girl (now aged 2.5) named Hayden.

Last year, J moved back to the Seattle area which is when i met her. She was talking with my friend-from-Alabama, L, about Hayden's name.

L: "My childhood [female] best friend from Alabama is named Hayden."
J: "The only other girl Hayden I've ever heard of is the one who inspired the name. She was a guide at Mt. St. Helen's a long time ago."
L: "THAT'S MY FRIEND!!!"

I don't know if adult Hayden* has met her wee namesake yet but it was an incredible coincidence and i'm still marveling over it.









* who just announced she's pregnant and yes, i will be asking if she'll name her child after J.
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Are you ever mistaken for a Mr. like i am?

Snippee I know exactly one other person with your first name and that person is a male. (And, frankly, I "knew" you before I met him so... he has a girl name.)
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Me, too! I am usually so flattered that i don't even have the "Should i tell them what a pain in the arse this name is?" dilemma until later.

I think there are several types of unusual names:

1- unusual but you'd recognize it as a name
2- common but unusual spelling
3- you'd recognize the word but most people wouldn't use it as a name
4-most people never heard it before
5-made up
(plus no doubt others I'm not thinking of)

I have a very unusual 1st name as well (a type 4 name). One of my friends (with a common name) named her child a slightly unusual name with a VERY unusual spelling (typical spelling in another country that she has friendship ties to) and I tried to talk her out of it (the spelling part) - but no go. So I think it doesn't matter if you tell people what a pain it is - they're going to do what they're going to do.

Anyway, my choice would be to go for a type 1 name, but for DD by the time we came to agreement it was a common name (but not a super common one i.e. not in the top 20). And I've found that even so, even with using the typical spelling, people still "alter" it.

LL
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I "knew" you before I met him so... he has a girl name.


Hee hee. When i lament to my friends (of whom i'm the only [snippee] they know) about receiving mail addressed to "Mr.", they always looked puzzled and say, "But...but...it's such a GIRL'S name!"

[snippee]: It's the new Kelly.
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I swore I would never get married again. Yet, I am seriously considering getting married, taking his last name and may even run off to the justice of the peace sooner rather than later!
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I swore I would never get married again. Yet, I am seriously considering getting married, taking his last name and may even run off to the justice of the peace sooner rather than later!

Yay! A baby!
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"Yay! A baby!"

What? Someone not telling me something? I thought it was because of the price of gas!

StarQ
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Most who hear my name assume I am of one race, when I am on the opposite end of the spectrum.

last weekend after a couplefew glasses of wine, while we were talking about you (yes- YOU) Uhura said
what is impolite's real name?

I told her.

She said Oh dear, that is a label


peace & names
t
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She said Oh dear, that is a label


Heehee.

The new last name just makes people wonder WTF I really am.

impolite
Is that....swedish?
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