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Waffle walks into the coffe shop, sporting a pink and red fedora.

Piney: Hey, good lookin'! What's shaking?
Waffle: Oh, not much. I'll take the usual.
Piney: Why the long face, Doll?
Waffle: I think I did something stupid.
Piney: Oh, come on, Hot Stuff. It can't be all that bad.

Waffle pulls off the fedora to reveals a shiny bald head.

Piney: Oh, dear.
Waffle: I told you!
Piney: Actually, it suits you. In fact, mama's getting a little overheated.
Waffle: Ew.

SkyblueErik walks over.

SBE: Hi dude, I've heard about your reputation with the ladies. How about some pointers?
Waffle: Err..
SBE: I've been sitting here all day trying to get up the nerve to ask a lady to join me for coffee. I almost did it too! See over there? I stood up and faced in her direction, I even took one step forward, but then I got woozy.

Angelina Jolie walks into the bar wearing hotpants and a tube top.

AJ: Hey chrome dome, that look works for you. I'm sick of saving African babies and dealing with Brad Pitt's BS. It's no fun trying to save the world, I miss my old, slutty self. How about we sit down and drink some coffee?

SkyBlueErik wets himself and faints.

Waffle: Um, okay.
(Voiceover: Wow, one of the most attractive women in the world wants to have coffee with me! My luck is turning around!)

Waffle and Angelina sit down and begin to talk.

AJ: So then I say "Look, you may be one of sexiest men in America, but you still have to put down the toilet seat...Hey, are you listening to me?
Waffle: Huh? Oh I'm sorry. I'm just...look you seem nice and all, but I've gotta run, I'll call you or email you or something.
AJ: What the hell?

Waffle runs out of the coffe shop and stops on the street.

Waffle: What's wrong with me? I thought she was great until we were on a date, and then I just lost interest. What do I want? Maybe I should just become a monk! After all, I've already got the hairstyle!

Music starts up and Waffle clicks his heels, flips on the fedora and starts off jauntily down the street.

Piney stands in the doorway shaking her head.

Piney: I hope he realizes that monks can't chat up chicks on the Internet.

Fade out to closing theme.

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