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Gratitude reportedly has benefits, proven by science
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong...

Being consciously grateful can help one feel more content and decreases depression.
research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.

This article says that 62% of Americans do not have enough savings to cover a medical emergency or car repair emergency.
https://www.marketwatch.com/story/most-americans-have-less-t...

Yeah, it's a 2015 article, that's been linked here on TMF...

Over the past 10 years, I've enjoyed numerous very elective expenses (planned trips, spontaneous trips and purchases, paid college tuition for a random kid), while also engaging in some elective medical/health expenses and a couple of not so elective health issues.

Having $1000 to cover some emergency, is, so far, not a concern.

For that, I am GRATEFUL!
I remind myself, and am consciously grateful on a weekly basis.

I've friends who tell me tales of not being able to go to the dentist, or to continue physical therapy sessions... or just get a massage... due to limited funds. Car emergencies.

It makes me sad. In a few instances I've "treated" one to a "luxury".*

I'm able to afford an expense for others, without worrying if it will affect my ability to help myself. I am grateful for that!

I've friends and acquaintances who cannot or are afraid to retire. Their defined contribution plan (401k, 403b, etc) hasn't paid out... I see these folks struggle to not be jealous of me.
It makes me sad to hear their stories and worries.

Why am I so lucky? Part is just flat out LUCK! Lucked into a job with a defined benefit pension.
Lucked into an education that gave me the qualifications for that job.
LUCK!
That job was WONDERFUL! And I was CONSCIOUSLY grateful every week! I really liked doing the job, perhaps more importantly, I realized the accruing benefits...

In addition, I'm real LBYM. And have been all my life. And absolutely hate (and STRESS) living pay check to pay check!

And, did I mention LUCK? I lucked into discovering TMF and intercst's retireearlyhomepage discussion board back in the mid 1990's. That was exactly the point in my "career" that I needed that information. That's how I knew what my job was doing for me. I had a roadmap to follow.

I am GRATEFUL!
I'm grateful that I was lucky at the right time and place.
I'm grateful for TMF, the retire early homepage, and all the posters who've shared their experiences- there are too many to mention specifically... Thank you, to all of you.

Grateful
ralph

*I ask myself "what can be done? What can I do? Will it really help? And, Am I willing to do it?"
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"This article says that 62% of Americans do not have enough savings to cover a medical emergency or car repair emergency." - Ralph


Oh I could easily buy a car for cash. Cars are not my problem. But I have no doubt that a serious medical problem, like melanoma cancer, or some other long term chronic illness, could wipe me out. My savings could be depleted in a hurry.

There is a huge difference between fixing a car and dealing with doctors and hospitals. Medical bills can be astronomical and add up quite quickly. What they charge is mind boggling.

I can't remember where I read the quote but it is something to the effect of "in the end the doctors and lawyers end up getting whatevers left."

Art
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"This article says that 62% of Americans do not have enough savings to cover a medical emergency or car repair emergency." - Ralph

You know my relatives?

I'm able to afford an expense for others, without worrying if it will affect my ability to help myself. I am grateful for that!

I have treated others to luxuries & necessities. I am highly grateful to be able to do that. But I wonder what they would have done if I hadn't been there...?

Being consciously grateful can help one feel more content and decreases depression.
research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression</i.

Part of me thinks this might be a coping mechanism. Oh God! I sure am grateful I was able to make the rent/fix the car/fix the furnace etc. I feel so content now Almost a slave point of view. The Boss didn't beat me today. I am grateful.

I notice that those with the most reason to be grateful seem to have the most overweening sense of entitlement & self-worth and little tendency towards gratitude.

Just some thoughts
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<<I notice that those with the most reason to be grateful seem to have the most overweening sense of entitlement & self-worth and little tendency towards gratitude.
>>


Have you watched the "Dr Phil" show much?


He provides enough history and detail to begin to understand the messes people make for themselves. Very often, parents, friends and relatives have been providing "help" for years, even decades, which enables people to continue irresponsible behavior.

Is that really help?


Pretty often Dr. Phil does offer people with failed lives help, but help being a responsible person, learning how to start living a good life, perhaps for the first time.

The trouble and difficulties in people's lives then become the motivation to change and improve someone's life.


Seattle Pioneer
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Have you watched the "Dr Phil" show much?

Never.

Controversial, I know. But I stand by my decision.
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Have you watched the "Dr Phil" show much?

Syke6: Never.

Occasionally, if I am scanning the channels to see what's on, I land briefly on Dr Phil. When that happens, I throw up a little bit sometimes if I can't get the channel changed quickly enough.
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A spouse's dementia is worse than poverty, worse than poor physical health, worse than death. Much worse.

=not so grateful any more :-/
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Never.
Controversial, I know. But I stand by my decision.


If there were only two channels and the choice was between Dr. Phil and Oprah and you put a gun to my head and said "Choose", I would say "Pull the trigger."
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alstromeria shares, "A spouse's dementia is worse than poverty, worse than poor physical health, worse than death. Much worse. =not so grateful any more :-/"


I have heard it called "the long goodbye."

Art
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Hi alstro 🙂

You've had a very stressful last few years. I remember when you were describing some adventure upon which you and spouse were embarking. Your adventures in Harlem.

And now, these last few years.

I hope that you can find a few small things which bring you some bits of happiness. Preparing healthy meals, perhaps? When you describe those, it comes across as "happy".

Peace, love, and light
ralph
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A spouse's dementia is worse than poverty, worse than poor physical health, worse than death. Much worse.

=not so grateful any more :-/


Interpreting some of the other posts on this thread... You should just think differently about it. Then it will be all wonderful. (not!) (I am with you)
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MisInterpreting some of the other posts on this thread...

There. Fixed that for you,
😃
ralph
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MisInterpreting some of the other posts on this thread...

There. Fixed that for you,
😃
ralph


Yes, I can see the monkey wrench marks 😃

(I copied the smiley face.. How does one insert pictures here?)
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How does one insert pictures here?

I'm posting from my smart phone, with it's plethora of emojis.

Any emoji on the phone uploads to the text.

AFAIK, emojis are not resident on my laptop, so when posting from there, I fall back on the keyboard characters :-). It is possible to search for emojis on the web, and download those.

🤨
ralph
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"AFAIK, emojis are not resident on my laptop, so when posting from there, I fall back on the keyboard characters :-). It is possible to search for emojis on the web, and download those.

🤨
ralph"

*************************************

Or one might write a thousand and one words.

Howie52
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"AFAIK, emojis are not resident on my laptop, so when posting from there, I fall back on the keyboard characters :-). It is possible to search for emojis on the web, and download those.

🤨
ralph"

*************************************

Or one might write a thousand and one words.

Howie52


Oh, fer crying out loud. There are several sites for free emojis. Here is one:
https://www.emojiace.com/copy

🤣😎😼

CNC
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In addition to the free sites that Count mentions, Windows 10 has an emoji keyboard that you can click with your mouse. A few of the emojis don't work in posts, you get a question mark.

I have the keyboard icon in the small icon area to the right of the keyboard. There aren't as many choices, but it's faster than going to another site.

https://www.isunshare.com/windows-10/2-ways-to-add-touch-key...

Wessex
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<<In addition to the free sites that Count mentions, Windows 10 has an emoji keyboard that you can click with your mouse. A few of the emojis don't work in posts, you get a question mark.>>



Personally, I consider myself modestly competent in expressing myself in the English language. Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.



Seattle Pioneer
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". Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.



Seattle Pioneer "

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

No more than abbreviations or contractions. They are a short-cut to express thoughts
in a way that folks enjoy.

BTW - partial literates would remain literate would they not? Merely incompletely
trained - which I suspect is the case for the majority of folks - myself included.

Howie52
Where is Webster when you need him?
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<<". Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.



Seattle Pioneer "

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

No more than abbreviations or contractions. They are a short-cut to express thoughts
in a way that folks enjoy. >>


Shakespeare used and created lots of short cuts to express thoughts, but no emojis.


Do you have any examples of the use of emojis in literature today?


<<BTW - partial literates would remain literate would they not? Merely incompletely
trained - which I suspect is the case for the majority of folks - myself included.>>


Yes, exactly the partially literate are the partially trained. Seems to be popular among a lot of teenagers, for example. Not so much among college graduates except perhaps in very informal usage.


My preference is to not have standards of literacy set by the partially literate, although I understand that dumbing things down is one of the aims of liberalism.



Seattle Pioneer
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He just doesn't grasp technology.

Walking upright was considered the end of the world and very "hippie" by some people at one time.

". Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.



Seattle Pioneer "

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

No more than abbreviations or contractions. They are a short-cut to express thoughts
in a way that folks enjoy.

BTW - partial literates would remain literate would they not? Merely incompletely
trained - which I suspect is the case for the majority of folks - myself included.

Howie52
Where is Webster when you need him?
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My preference is to not have standards of literacy set by the partially literate, although I understand that dumbing things down is one of the aims of liberalism.

Seattle Pioneer


Interesting. My observation is that more be more educated people tend to be more liberal. Trump's base seems to consist largely of the least educated.

CNC
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<<He just doesn't grasp technology.

Walking upright was considered the end of the world and very "hippie" by some people at one time.

". Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.



Seattle Pioneer ">>



From what I've seen, emoji's are part and parcel of the communication skills of the partially literate, which includes a lot of abbreviations used to cover up lack of spelling skills, and a lot of spelling errors that would be covered up with abbreviations if the user had the spelling skills to realize they didn't know how to spell the words they don't abbreviate.

I suppose I ought to applaud the fact that the partially literate are trying to communicate in a written language, allegedly English, in order to be able to send texts.

But there's always the risk that the English usage of the partially literate would become part of standard English, too. THAT is scary!

Incidentally, has anyone coined a name for this new dialect used by the partially literate in texts?


Seattle Pioneer
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<<Interesting. My observation is that more be more educated people tend to be more liberal. Trump's base seems to consist largely of the least educated.

CNC>>



I'm imagining the College Freshman remedial English teacher who gets an essay from a student written in "Emojisan," which I'll coin as a term for the dialect used among the partially literate junior high school text writers.


Seattle Pioneer
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Incidentally, has anyone coined a name for this new dialect used by the partially literate in texts?


Seattle Pioneer
____________________

It's called textspeak; the term has been around for years.

I'll admit to my own discomfort with emojis...but trying to denigrate them and related features of the digital era is a losing game. Rules (such as they are) of language change in accordance with the norms of use--not the other way around.

And I thought we'd been told that elitism was the exclusive problem of pesky liberals. ;-)

Steve
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<<And I thought we'd been told that elitism was the exclusive problem of pesky liberals. ;-)

Steve>>



Heh, heh! No, I'm on board with being pedantic on this issue...!


<<Incidentally, has anyone coined a name for this new dialect used by the partially literate in texts?


Seattle Pioneer
____________________

It's called textspeak; the term has been around for years.>>



Thank you ----first time I've heard of that term. When I text I do it in standard English. And I don't have people textspeaking to me, either.



Seattle Pioneer
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Penmanship is disappearing also. I've noticed that when I take notes (e.g. in the lab) that my writing is terrible, even if I slow down and try to do it nicely. I have samples of my writing from before (e.g. grad school) and it was much better. Much neater. It's because I mostly type now, I'm sure.
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Penmanship is disappearing also.

I've noticed that too. I have to really slow down a lot to write as neatly as I did when I was taking notes in class every day. The last several years I was working, I attended a lot of meetings (there's got to be a joke in there somewhere). As an engineering director, meetings probably comprised 80% - 90% of the time I spent in the office during regular work hours. And I took notes in those meetings (except for the ones I initiated. I asked my Admin Asst to take notes in my own meetings). But by the late 90's, I was using my Palm Pilot to take those notes because I could take more legible notes using the shorthand available on it than I could take trying to write legibly. And when I got done with the Palm Pilot, I could dock it to my computer and get an electronic copy that I could write further comments on using my keyboard.

Today I write by hand even less. The only time I notice is usually in November when I write notes in all the Holiday Greeting cards I send to friends and relatives. I do still write a unique note to each person or family. I used to be able to do that in a half-day or so, but now it takes me most of two days to do it all. I'm seriously thinking about resigning myself to produce one of those family update newsletters that I could type on the computer and mass print.
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". Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.

Seattle Pioneer "


Within the confines of the necessarily short messages (Very few people will read a long post, right?) emojis serve the purpose of saying "Hey, this is a joke!" Or "Hey, I am being sarcastic." There are other uses, given a diffuse (and dispersed) readership. They are thereby useful.

CNC
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1pg: Penmanship is disappearing also. I've noticed that when I take notes (e.g. in the lab) that my writing is terrible, even if I slow down and try to do it nicely. I have samples of my writing from before (e.g. grad school) and it was much better. Much neater. It's because I mostly type now, I'm sure.

My pathetic scrawl has been the bane of my grade school grades, back when we were graded on penmanship. My father was grieved that I couldn't make something like the fine script he so easily wrote.*

Sadly, as I have aged, my penmanship has degraded. Good to have a keyboard, no?

I find that an emoji can save a long exposition to say that this is sarcasm, or this is humorous.

CNC
*Dad had a ninth grad education, literally.
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<<". Emojis are for the partially literate, in my opinion.

Seattle Pioneer "

Within the confines of the necessarily short messages (Very few people will read a long post, right?) emojis serve the purpose of saying "Hey, this is a joke!" Or "Hey, I am being sarcastic." There are other uses, given a diffuse (and dispersed) readership. They are thereby useful.

CNC>>



Sounds like an effort to convert English into a system of Chinese like symbols. The Chinese have been trying to figure out how to escape that complicated written language trap for a long time.



Seattle Pioneer
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<<I find that an emoji can save a long exposition to say that this is sarcasm, or this is humorous.>>


You seem to express yourself fine in a few words with Standard English.

Do we really want to graft on to English systems of complex ideograms to represent ideas such as used in Japanese and Chinese?


Your penmanship leaves something to be desired ----how about drawing ideographs as part of your letters?

Or reading those others send to you?



Seattle Pioneer
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And I don't have people textspeaking to me, either.

Oh, boo-hoo. 😪

Pete
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SP: You seem to express yourself fine in a few words with Standard English.

Do we really want to graft on to English systems of complex ideograms to represent ideas such as used in Japanese and Chinese?

I'm sorry you have difficulty understanding a simple declarative sentence.

CNC
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<<And I don't have people textspeaking to me, either.

Oh, boo-hoo. 😪

Pete>>



Heh, heh! I can see I need to copyright that....


Fun, isn't it?


Seattle Pioneer
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Folks noticed that written messages, email, text etc LACK the "body language" that adds true meaning to the words.

Therefore, writers began to add "emotion signals".. emo .. get it?

:-) :-( =8^o and such from the keyboard.

Over time, these "emo" signals were converted to "pictures" and began to be called "emoji".

Emojis are a way to indicate the information that body language provides in a f2f meeting 🥺

And, people have gotten pretty creative with them.
Here's a useful one 💩

😆
ralph, when he was in his teens had a highly religious uncle with a highschool education who complained that folks who used cuss words did so because they were uneducated and had limited vocabulary. I believed that uncle... Until I got to college and had a prof (PhD) with a superior vocabulary, who cussed as an art form. I realized my highschool educated, Baptist uncle was full of 💩.
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"ralph, when he was in his teens had a highly religious uncle with a highschool education who complained that folks who used cuss words did so because they were uneducated and had limited vocabulary. I believed that uncle... Until I got to college and had a prof (PhD) with a superior vocabulary, who cussed as an art form. I realized my highschool educated, Baptist uncle was full of 💩. "

*****************************************************
Just in passing - there is a difference between a person being mistaken
and being unable to see a different situation or recognize exceptions to
their typical thinking. The problems with emojis - and with much of our language
is a tendency to categorize all and sundry rather than see individuals who may have
their own individual quirks and prejudices - but simply individuals.

People are more - and less - than their clan.
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👁
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