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(cross posted, sorry 'bout that, they suggested I post my dilemma here.)
OK here's the dilemma: SS is completing his associates degree end of this quarter. He applied to only two schools for college, one in state, one out of state (by about 1000 miles). In state school rejected him, out of state school accepted him (his grades are really pretty bad). Because he has a learning disability he can get a full scholarship which includes in state tuition, all his books and fees, room and board. It will cover his attending out of state school but only for the in state tuition. We calulated that he'd be about $8-10K short the first year (out of state tuition difference plus his car insurance, gas money and misc.) If he establishes residency his second year would be in state tuition so he'd be out of pocket about $2-4K.

Unfortunately SS was stupid with his money. His mother before she left for parts unknown, made him put money up for college from the money he made working. We estimated it was about $5-6K. Since the money has been under his control during junior college he has frittered it away (upgraded his car to a newer model, likes to take vacations with buddies during spring break, etc, and loves boy toys) so that he only has about $1500 left!

Neither DH nor I know anything about student loans. How does he (or can he) get a student loan to cover the difference between in state and out of state tuition at least?

As far as the remainder of his college expenses...I suggested to DH that SS sell his boy toys (he could get $700 for his bass boat and trailer among other things). DH thought that wasn't a good idea because it was 'only' $700 and if he sold all his boy toys he still wouldn't have enough for the living expense short fall to get him through college. This surprised me because DH is very frugal and practical. We are discouraging SS from working during the school year because his grades are so bad he really needs to spend time studying. He could work in the summer but he still wouldn't make enough money to cover the shortfall based on his spending habits which we can't seem to change.

I guess that I'm a 'mean step mother' because I'm reluctant to have us cover his shortfalls because of his bad habits. It would be money that wouldn't be going towards our retirement and IMO would continue enabling him to make poor decisions.

We don't want him to sit out a year because 1) he'd loose momentum and might not go back and 2) he would be dropped from our health insurance.

Thoughts? Suggestions? Sorry about being so long.
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