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The fine print on a quarter:

Acceptance of this coin in the denomination of 25 US cents, hereinafter referred to as a "quarter," constitutes implicit acceptance of the following conditions:

1) Insertion of this quarter into any orifice, either your own or someone else's, is not recommended and may result in serious injury or death. The US Treasury assumes no liability resulting from such actions.
2) This quarter is not digestible by humans and has no nutritional value. The US Treasury will not be held responsible for any discomfort or injury occurred as the result of accidental or deliberate swallowing of this quarter.
3) While certain third parties offer products such as washing machines that are compatible with this quarter, such compatibility cannot be guaranteed. Resolution of such problems is the responsibility of the third party concerned. This quarter may not work in products that were designed for quarters minted prior to 1940, or coins in denominations other than 25 cents.
4) The value of this quarter is fixed by law at 25 cents. However, the purchasing power of this quarter may decrease over time due to a phenomenon known as "inflation." The Treasury assumes no responsibility for any decline in purchasing power caused by this phenomenon.
5) While this quarter may be used to choose between two options by flipping it into the air and employing the procedure known as "heads or tails" (q.v.) the Treasury assumes no responsibility for the consequences of actions taken based on such a decision.
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