Skip to main content
This Board Has Moved

This board has been migrated to our new platform! Check out the new home page at or click below to go directly to the new Board on the new site.

Go to the New Site
Message Font: Serif | Sans-Serif
No. of Recommendations: 10
The clock ticked, the bell struck, and nine of ten struck out. It's all over for another year and all's left is the weeping and gnashing of teeth of the nine while one of ten basks in the glory of winning The Feste Award.

There is no truth to the rumor that the winner is Seven of Nine winning not because of the ability to educate, inform and amuse but because she is built so magnificently as to cause instant acne in teens.

Hi there, I'm Casey Read here in Mudville, BC, home of the strike out. Four times at bat and whiffed the whole shebang four times. My excuse is that I am a winner in other areas and that not having The Feste doesn't change a thing in my life. I also lie about the size of the fish I catch. Truth is that if I had The Feste I would have status. I would not be the gadfly of TMF but a Personage that, once having The Feste would enhance my posts from flatulent to breezy.

Consider, for a moment, the reign of me as The Feste Award winner. In the past those who have this have been accepting of it yet not using it. Nice people, all of them, but not using the award to further certain aims. Not that I would abuse the honor as in, “Twitty, peel me a grape,” or “Bogey, there's absolutely no mulligans,” but that my influence would be more subtle. As in unlimited recs for those having a first name starting with M and a last name starting with R.

That's but conjecture because the winner of The Fest is one of those meeting TMF's standard of enhancing the community and not me whose writing centers on beer, farts, and bank shots into the corner pocket. The winner will be one of the erudite (not that there's anything wrong with that) and eight of the nine remaining will accept their loss while one, me, sobs, belches, breaks wind, and drops the five ball with a masse shot caroming off the seven ball that then sinks the eight.

That's life: sometimes you're the cue and sometimes you're the eight ball. Nonetheless, the clock has struck, the bell tolled and, while no man is an island, I am islanded in The Isle of Feste Noodnicks.

Of course, if I do win The Feste forget everything written above.


Print the post  


When Life Gives You Lemons
We all have had hardships and made poor decisions. The important thing is how we respond and grow. Read the story of a Fool who started from nothing, and looks to gain everything.
Contact Us
Contact Customer Service and other Fool departments here.
What was Your Dumbest Investment?
Share it with us -- and learn from others' stories of flubs.
Work for Fools?
Winner of the Washingtonian great places to work, and Glassdoor #1 Company to Work For 2015! Have access to all of TMF's online and email products for FREE, and be paid for your contributions to TMF! Click the link and start your Fool career.