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No. of Recommendations: 3
http://www.geocities.com/maryromantic1/


...a hobby other than this one, that is. Read as much of her site as you can stand. I thought I was picky but this gal is a freak.
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No. of Recommendations: 3
She wants an atheist/agnostic who doesn't masturbate.
That shouldn't be too hard to find.

swimdad (who jumps at any opportunity to use the word masturbate in a post)
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No. of Recommendations: 2
I'm very loving, affectionate, honest, faithful, gentle, strong, empathetic, compassionate, romantic, open, intelligent, wise, articulate, rational, logical, objective, practical, analytical, philosophical, existentialistic, passionate, eccentric, and fun. I have a great sense of humor. I value chemistry. I've worked out a lot in my life, and I'd relish getting regular exercise with a special friend. I love life and personal growth and development. I have high self-esteem


... and apparently an incredible grasp of the obvious!

Errin
wouldn't be ironic if she found the man of her dreams and he hated her neurotic, egotistical butt????
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No. of Recommendations: 6
When I was single I should have had a page like Mary's. Only my page would have had less homework and more jokes.

I am Jean. I am sarcastic and hate dancing, housework and meeting new people. I am probably smarter than you. I'm a great cook, so once I am in the picture we will eat exotic and interesting food, and your cans of Dinty Moore stew will be given to the food shelf. Sexy lingerie itches and requires dry cleaning so I wear white cotton underpants. I'd like to lose ten pounds but don't hold your breath. I like sports that I can do by myself without anyone bothering me. Republicans need not apply.


I'll bet I would have gotten more response than Mary.
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I am Jean. I am sarcastic and hate dancing, housework and meeting new people. I am probably smarter than you. I'm a great cook, so once I am in the picture we will eat exotic and interesting food, and your cans of Dinty Moore stew will be given to the food shelf. Sexy lingerie itches and requires dry cleaning so I wear white cotton underpants. I'd like to lose ten pounds but don't hold your breath. I like sports that I can do by myself without anyone bothering me. Republicans need not apply.

Hell! I just fell in love with you. Or at least I would, if I were a lesbian, which I'm not. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Errin
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No. of Recommendations: 3
If there ever was a female dork, you found her.
I retract all the dorky GMS babe names from Z.

MeatL'Eff
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No. of Recommendations: 1
Did you read that she still has sex with her ex, Arsenios, but on another page she wants a man who doesn't even masterbate? And she won't have sex with any new men until she is married but she will continute to have sex with Arsenios.

Whacko



Sheryl
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No. of Recommendations: 2
I think I've seen this Mary before on some talk show. She founded the National Chastity Association in 1987, which advocated dating exclusively for something like 2 years before getting married, but without any sex, kissing, or even holding hands. According to her site, she still believes in the no-touching rule, except for the Arsenios clause.

I wish she'd post Arsenios' email address.
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No. of Recommendations: 4
I would rather masturbate than have sex with any of my ex-es, would you like their email addresses?

Errin
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I wonder if Arsenios masturbates.
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I wonder if Arsenios masturbates.

Reminds me of one of the funniest parts of the site where she says that Arsenios is not sleeping with anyone else even though he comes over very rarely to bang her. Yeah, right.

I cannot even imagine having an aversion to masterbation. I would think it was really weird if anyone tried to tell me they don't do it, especially someone who wasn't having sex any other way.

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Omigod! I just noticed she is 48 and thinks she is youthful. I don't think so! I am about to be 42 and I look young for my age, but youthful???... only in my dreams.

Errin
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No. of Recommendations: 2
I don't care how youthful she is. She's a nutcase and no amount of step aerobics or Oil of Olay is going to change that.
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step aerobics

She does step aerobics? Does she do Tae Bo, too? (not that there is anything wrong with that).

Errin
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No. of Recommendations: 3
Well, I missed it. The website is not currently available. But, from what I got out of your posts, she sounds like a complete fruitcake.

TD3
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No. of Recommendations: 1
TD3: <<Well, I missed it. The website is not currently available.>>

Try this one: http://hometown.aol.com/maryromantic/index.htm


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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A term to assign to your personal introduction to me is want.


Someone want to parse this sentence for me, because I have no idea what it means.

Errin
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No. of Recommendations: 3
Cripes. What a weirdo! This woman has got to be a major pain in the @ss to be around. I don't know anybody who could even spend 15 minutes in a room with her, much less enter into a relationship. A guy would have to be a masochist...
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A guy would have to be a masochist...

I'll say. No kissing, no holding hands, no self-pleasuring. Can you imagine her dates?

Date: Well, Mary, thank you for a lovely evening. May I wave goodbye to you?

Mary: Well, I guess so. Whoops, gotta go--Arsenios is coming over in five minutes to have sex with me.
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No. of Recommendations: 3
Mary: Well, I guess so. Whoops, gotta go--Arsenios is coming over in five minutes to have sex with me.

Yeah, she's gotta be swamped with fellows wanting a date...

TD3
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No. of Recommendations: 3
I would rather masturbate than have sex with any of my ex-es, would you like their email addresses?

It wasn't always the way though, I'm guessing. What changed?

Ascalon of the Cult of Ascalon (master of the open-ended question)

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No. of Recommendations: 4
It wasn't always the way though, I'm guessing. What changed?

Well, dumbass, when you break up with someone, it usually means you no longer have sex with them.

red




p.s. Whoops, didn't mean to call you dumbass--I thought you were Dreamer.
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Well, dumbass, when you break up with someone, it usually means you no longer have sex with them.


It does? Damn! Wish I would have known that sooner.

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No kissing, no holding hands, no self-pleasuring.

Is that for the whole date or just in the restaurant or just when driving? Self-pleasuring when driving can cause accidents, I'm told.

Ascalon
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No. of Recommendations: 3
Is that for the whole date or just in the restaurant or just when driving?

It's for always, at all times, until you get married. If you're Mary's boyfriend, the best you can hope for is a nocturnal emission.
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Well, dumbass, when you break up with someone, it usually means you no longer have sex with them.

Really? Why should that be?

p.s. Whoops, didn't mean to call you dumbass--I thought you were Dreamer.

I thought YOU were Dreamer?
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No. of Recommendations: 4
If you're Mary's boyfriend, the best you can hope for is a nocturnal emission.

I'd want her to be sleeping with her head on my lap when it happened.
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Thanks for the link, Swimmy...

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No. of Recommendations: 7
Some submissive men (and perhaps some other gentlemen) like to do all of the household tasks for a woman. If a man truly loved to cook, clean, or do my laundry for me, I'd probably enjoy letting him perform such services. In this case, however, I'd need to make sure that he would be happy with me even if I didn't let him do these chores. I wouldn't want his domestic work to be a fetish.

Gawd, if a man wanted to come over and do my housework, who the hell cares if it becomes a fetish???


CaveGirl


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Gawd, if a man wanted to come over and do my housework, who the hell cares if it becomes a fetish???


CaveGirl


I think I would tell him it "turns me on" when you do the laundry and housework .... in fact, I think it would ..... but then I probably have a fetish about men who do housework!

Errin
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My name is Mary. I'm 48, divorced, and nonsmoking.

Someone should e-mail THIS gem to Mary...

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/lewk1_96.pdf

Especially the pages that show females vastly outnumbering males in her age cohort....Her only requirements s/b "wears pants & doesn't have a flatline EKG."
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Ok...my memory is pretty crappy, but I am pretty sure I wasn't ever "LucidMeatloaf".

I really have forgotten more than I remember.

I think GsJs created this board as TickerChicks.


Dreamer
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