Message Font: Serif | Sans-Serif
 
No. of Recommendations: 14
When you call your girlfriend the night before opening day.

While peeing. Because you are drunk. And the guys are yelling from across the camp to you because they know you are peeing and talking to your girlfriend, and they don't just want to make fun of you, they also want you to bring back the other cooler with the rest of the beer.

And, they wanted you to tell your girlfriend that they love her, too, and not to worry - they have a snuggling schedule aaaaallllll figured out so you don't get too lonely.

SNORT

Since he is gone I put the cozy warm flannel sheets on the bed, and tucked them in at the end (he's too tall for us to tuck them in without his feet getting all caught up, usually). And I watched my voice crush (Mike Rowe swooooooon), then the Cowboys Cheerleaders, and now I'm watching old rich people buy a vacation home in Las Vegas and eating a bowl of Cheerios.

And tomorrow the kids and I will get groceries and hit a Holiday Bazaar with a lady from work and her three year old and then we will come home and take a nap. And then we will go to my parent's house, I will let the dog run free in the back yard until he can hardly stand, and then the dog and I will come home and the kids will stay there because Grandma declared she would be keeping them whether or not I wanted her to, and I will come home and I will have leftover Chinese food and a glass of wine and then a looooong hot bath and try not to let in the adorable-but-wildish kitty that's been wandering to our back door every few days from the woods behind us and then I will go to bed and I will take up every.damn.inch of that king size bed, yes I will, and I will sleep the sleep of those that need sleep.

It's good here.

impolite
Print the post  

Announcements

What was Your Dumbest Investment?
Share it with us -- and learn from others' stories of flubs.
When Life Gives You Lemons
We all have had hardships and made poor decisions. The important thing is how we respond and grow. Read the story of a Fool who started from nothing, and looks to gain everything.
Contact Us
Contact Customer Service and other Fool departments here.
Work for Fools?
Winner of the Washingtonian great places to work, and Glassdoor #1 Company to Work For 2015! Have access to all of TMF's online and email products for FREE, and be paid for your contributions to TMF! Click the link and start your Fool career.